A Wonderful First Year to Come

My littlest Ella bear...how I love you already. Only 6 weeks old and you've changed my life forever. I couldn't quite put into words what a force you are in my heart, but i've decided to try...by writing to you everyday for a year, giving you insight into life day by day. Not everyday will be incredibly exciting to the outside world, but to me, when you coo and smile, the world pauses & I can't take in enough of your little milestones. 
This time last year, life was so different. There was a definite sense of freedom to it, where now, i'm not just roaming life everyday without a real sense of direction. I have you & daddy and thats enriched my life so much, im so grateful to life for putting the wheels in motion to have you. When I first found out we were having you, I wasn't sure I could handle the responsibility of a little life depending on me, but that soon went away when I first felt you kick. After that, you never stopped making your presence known! I can already see your little personality coming thru, in your assertive screams for attention letting me know you must be held...NOW! And im more than happy to oblige. In the way you love to be held closely & cuddled. I can see those big brown eyes full of awe when you look around the room, the same room as yesterday, but to you its all new. 


I want to make sure you grow up in a world that enriches you, full of music, creativity & the ability for you to be whoever you want. I wonder everyday what direction life will take you in...will you be an artist like daddy or will you have my flare for fashion? Life has a funny way of putting its own spin on things, so nothing is too certain now, but I love to wonder & imagine. I hope you look back on this & keep all these little entries close to your heart. I want you to know, even now, even though its too soon for you to comprehend how much I truly do love you. Although I know you feel it when I kiss your little toes and soothe your little achy belly. When I first held you, and looked up at daddy, teary eyed, I knew you made our love stronger & our lives better. 

Sometimes the nights aren't easy, but we try everything...we've recently discovered that you really like the sound of rain, it brings you to the deepest state of sleep i've ever seen you in, which gives mommy & daddy some much needed rest. You also really love mommies boobies, and as much as it hurts my back to feed you all day long, I dont mind. I often gaze at you feeding away, sometimes your eyes are the size of saucers, so focused, and other times you're practically asleep, usually around 3am. 

And so begins another night...daddy's at work, he'll be home soon. Today it was just me and you. You were a good girl today, we played in the morning in your room, although you were only into it for 15 minutes, then we moved on to something else, thats usually how it goes. I also found you like staring out the door when the sun is setting. I play music for you and you bounce in your little froggy chair. I gave you a bath, alone! Usually daddy is there to help, but we managed ok. You didn't start crying until halfway in, which i'm positive is progress. Soon you'll be playing with all your little bath toys, never wanting to get out, or until your fingers prune! Off we go to bed, you're already fast asleep. I love you Ella Rose, always & forever. -Mommy